Jʋsʈ ɑ Ɓoƴ

Saturday, 27 December 2014

"I deserve better"

Starting tomorrow, I'm going to move past this whole ordeal and find some other source of happiness. I've uninstalled IMVU and Chad is working on erasing any attraction I have towards him. It's over. It really is. Let's forsake a promising future where we could have lived out our fantasies together all because we cannot compromise. At this point, I'm neither upset nor mad, I'm simply heartbroken.

But a heart can be mended with new-found love, so yet again, I remain eager and hopeful. I've read somewhere that life is too short, and that I shouldn't ever look back. So... this is it! I'm trudging forward with what's left of my shattered heart, ego and pride.

I deserve better.

"True love is all about sacrifice." I just want to put that out there for anyone who is reading this. Yes, while it may seem unreasonable to fulfill a demand your loved one ask of you, you do it anyway because you love them - without question or reason. Think this seems ridiculous? Well, it doesn't matter because each of us have our own definition of what love is (it's subjective). And if a couple doesn't share the same concept of what love is, then chances are, things will end bitterly (which it did... for me).

Trust me, I know. There'll always be this 'fear' that if you give in too much to someone, they might walk all over you. It's called being "taken advantage of", and I'm all too familiar with that, but a little concession every now and then helps to reassure your partner that his/her feelings matter, especially if your partner is so hung up/bothered by something that you could easily just diminish.

What I went through these past few weeks was utter chaos. I'm looking forward to the new year because it's about time I rake out the old and ring in the new.

To sum up this post (about this break up), I'm just going to say - in fairness - that both of us were at fault. I don't like to dwell in the past, I like to "cut to the chase". If you love someone, you do everything in your power to make him/her/it happy, not be persistent in trying to defend yourself. Because ultimately, you may win the war but you'll still lose the battle, whereas if you take a chance, things might turn out differently. Sure, there will always be the risk of being taken advantage of (him/her/it wanting/expecting more from you), but look at what NOT taking the risk has led to? How much worst can it get?

Everyone got hurt in the end when it could have all been avoided so easily. I've learned my lesson now, so it's time to close this chapter of my life. I knew there was a reason for adapting the persona 'Tyler Chippendale', because I foresaw this happening. I will do everything in my power to preserve my alter ego, 'Logan Withertooth'.

Yet another heartbreak...

Yet another heart ache...

Life becomes less about love, and more about lament.

Take it away, Semisonic.

ツ | 3:29 am

'ℬℴʋʈ ℳℯ

My name is Zachary (

)
Born on Christmas of '92 (

)

Gay (

) Separated (

)

I ❤ my best friends
«Jen Ross» and «Bekah»

ℳℴℴɖ

Ꮚɾ¡ʈʈℯɳ Ʈℎℴʋℊℎʈʂ

ℬʋʗҚℯʈ ℒ¡ʂʈ

☑ Find a best friend
☑ Learn to play the piano
☑ Be in a relationship
☑ See New York skyline
☑ Become a Game Sage
☑ Be part of a fraternity
☑ Play on a grand piano
☑ Lose virginity
☑ Have a pet kitten/cat
☑ Experience snow
☑ See the northern lights
❒ Ride a horse
❒ Sit cozily by a fireplace
❒ Build a snowman
❒ Dip a chocolate fondue fountain
❒ Release an album
❒ Be a farmer for a day
❒ See the HOLLYWOOD sign
❒ Join the circus
❒ Go skinny dipping
❒ Taste orkney ice cream