Jʋsʈ ɑ Ɓoƴ

Wednesday, 1 July 2015

"Welcome... to adulthood"

It's been two months since I last posted and so much has happened.

I've come to realize something - I'm a problematic child. The tantrums I throw are beyond ridiculous and my expectations are extremely surreal, but I behave that way anyhow.

The one thing I excel at, however, is running away. Somewhere down the road in my messed-up life, I'll look back and appreciate all that Mark (a good friend of mine) has done for me. To say he is an incredible friend is a severe understatement. Mark is a diamond in the rough, not just for the very reason that he took me in when I got kicked out of my previous "home" (yes, I was a houseboy), but because he's a pure saint. He has the best intentions for me even though I've probably taken all of what he has done for granted. These past few weeks with him... I've never felt so at home.. ever.

Best part about living with him was knowing I could come to him with anything and he wouldn't tell me what I WANTED to hear, but what I NEEDED to hear. I doubt I'll find a roommate as good as him, and honestly, I don't deserve any of this. He can do so much better.

The downfall of this situation (and why I chose to do what I am about to do) is... Mark is best friends with the guy I wrote about in my previous post and so much has transpired in the past couple of weeks that I have to remove myself from his life before it leads to something destructive.

Come Friday, I plan to move out and leave the virtual world of imvu. No need for fanfare or a farewell party, it's a necessary path. I need to make my own mistakes, and maybe I'll only ever be objectified as a boy toy.. a symbol of sex, but that's okay - I've come to terms with that. My inner conscience is screaming against leaving, begging me to reconsider, but I've mustered up enough uncommon sense to walk away.

Whatever happens in the months to come, be it 'regret', 'loneliness' or 'self-loathing', I have only myself to blame and that's the way it should be. Welcome.. to adulthood.

ツ | 9:22 am

'ℬℴʋʈ ℳℯ

My name is Zachary (

)
Born on Christmas of '92 (

)

Gay (

) Separated (

)

I ❤ my best friends
«Jen Ross» and «Bekah»

ℳℴℴɖ

Ꮚɾ¡ʈʈℯɳ Ʈℎℴʋℊℎʈʂ

ℬʋʗҚℯʈ ℒ¡ʂʈ

☑ Find a best friend
☑ Learn to play the piano
☑ Be in a relationship
☑ See New York skyline
☑ Become a Game Sage
☑ Be part of a fraternity
☑ Play on a grand piano
☑ Lose virginity
☑ Have a pet kitten/cat
☑ Experience snow
☑ See the northern lights
❒ Ride a horse
❒ Sit cozily by a fireplace
❒ Build a snowman
❒ Dip a chocolate fondue fountain
❒ Release an album
❒ Be a farmer for a day
❒ See the HOLLYWOOD sign
❒ Join the circus
❒ Go skinny dipping
❒ Taste orkney ice cream